Alcohol helps

You know I'm not fucking boogeyman! I don't know why the fuck she feels explaining herself to me if she eats chocolate or whatever. Yes, this is follow up to the previous post, except this time I play the bad friend. I'm a gemini, yes, that means two sides of me sometimes.

I can't handle this situation. I've got my own ED and I'm not willing to help E develop one. No. I wouldn't care less if she eats that chocolate, if she gained a kilo, if she did her work out. Really.

I am not her "diet pal". This thing I have sometimes is hurting me and I won't try to pretend I diet and oh, let's talk about programme. No, because starving and bingeing is NOT a diet programme and because I don't want to be "sexy smokin' body".

It's deeper than that.

I'm so angry in case you couldn't already tell. I hate this situation, hate that parents push me to find a boyfriend cause this is the right time for them, hate the fact that cousin and I ate non stop yesterday I didn't even tried to go on the scale in case it breaks, hate the fact that Valentines Day exists and whatever you do that day means it's love (well it's not!), hate the fact that my umbrella's broken,

hate the fact that my mood swings the whole fucking time.

In other news, there is a party tonight. Blah. I wouldn't care to go. What for? But I will go and pretend I'm having a good time. Alcohol helps, too.

I promise I'll play nice :)