So I have been wanting to cry all day, but instead I'm struggling not to (at least, because smiling is just out of the question).
Why can't I just cry?
Because today, tonight actually, I'm leaving for more holidays. So I must be happy right? I went to get my nails done, I went furniture shopping and now I'm packing my things.
Actually I really really don't want to leave tonight. I'm one kilo up, and feel like a balloon cause my period's coming tmrrw. Last week E came here at my hometown and apparently 5 days non-stop eating (cause she had to try EVERYTHING!) can easily gain me a whole kilo. Going back to remember how long it took me to loose it and I'll start crying like a baby.
I'm mad today at noone, no, no actually I'm furious.
...
So on August 17th I'm flying back at my island! It feels so good, it has to be. I have exams, of course, but it's not bothering me, not yet.
I love you
i really do, you know :)
I've been totally FUCKING FURIOUS as well AHHHHHHH!! I had a really good cry yesterday, and I actually feel a lot better. I hope you can find your release soon. Try to have a little fun on holiday :)
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I understand totally what you are feeling. Enjoy your holiday and have a great time! Thanks for your words of encouragement.
ReplyDeleteI hope you can try to enjoy your holiday, but I totally know what you mean. Most times, when it comes down to it, I would rather just stay home. It's so much safer there. But good luck, and I know you will lose that kilo and much more in no time :) xoxo
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