It's a hoLe in the wall.

Okay, so she told me she didn't tell anything.. And then what was all that "do you need to tell me sth?" from my mom?.. Pfff I don't think it's worth thinking of it anymore, I was just pissed..

I went to the gym about an hour ago to do my tae bo class and I did so ooo fucking good!! You know today's my ex's birthday (previous post title..) and I'm not in the best mood. So I went to the gym and just "kicked some ass" hahaha!! Oh I had so much fun :) and stayed more than usual so propably burned lots of cals.. Well idk why this day affected me much, I broke up with him but oh, well..

So today I had two slices of pineapple, two salads and a cherry diet yogurt, I'm happy with these. And of course about a litre of plain coffee.. and still feel sleepy when it comes to studying. My stupid book weights 3.8 kilosss!! this is almost how much I want to loose for my GW1, so ironic...

I wish you lived down the street..

Okay, so I think you've realised by now that my titles don't have a thing to do with what I post.. just making that clear. Today I was so busy with housework and studying (finally!) that almost forgot to eat.. I was all day with a cup of coffee in my hands and now my hands are shaking haha..Almost, I said. Of course my beloved mom called this morning to noon, and kept telling me what to eat because she said now I'm going home I'm gonna to a blood test -again- so they'll know how well I've been eating. Hm how about not eating at all?? It's not I'm scared or sth, it's just I cannot have that talking shit all over again. So I had some chicken with tomato and now I'll have some yogurt oh, and I had pineapple this morning..

Anyways, I so fell in love with a song today. Oh,I just love it. It's "you make me feel" from Archive. They always have those moody songs I keep falling in love with...

I decided today I want to go for a drink with my friends. It's been so long since I last went out..

We walk

I saw him today at the bus stop. Or better he saw me. I have been avoiding him for about one week and a half now and today we met. Okay I was calm, I never over-react, I knew someday this would happen. But today as I was at the stop buying a juice (160cals) on my way to the hospital ? Well I didn't see that coming.

Never mind.. So today is weighting day. This morning the scale showed 57.1 but ohnestly I was feeling much heavier. I guess that's good. I had that juice for breakfast and 3 diet cheese cookies cause I had to take some pills. And in abou two hours I'm going with my cousin to a fish tavern. Hope she doesn't order shit. Some fish and calamari would be nice. We'll see. And then I will have a coffee at starbucks and after that it's my yoga class today so I'm not eating anything else. Or maybe yesterday's apple after the gym.

And now they are calling me to tell me my netbook has arrived. Wtf? I was there like half an hour ago and there was nothing, it pisses me off when things like that happen.

Oh, well.

Coffee or tea please?

This blog is about me.

Actually about my story of trying to be perfect. The way I want, the skinny way and anna inspires me to keep strong. Cause in this world no one thinks of you as attractive if you are not skinny. And I shall never feel attractive if I'm not skinny.

My HW is 58 kilos (sorry I'm counting in kilos). My CW is 57.3 so annoying!

My first GW would be 54 and second 52.

Then we'll see..

Starting to get addicted to coffee. I mean now that it's exam period I spend my mornings at starbucks studying and have either a plain grande coffee or a grande nonfat latte (I read that it has only 100cals plz let me know if I'm wrong!!). That's my breakfast and if it's pills day I have a "fitness bar" too for 89cals.

But I love coffee as much as I love tea.

And I could just live on coffee and tea.

I'm telling you now: this week I will only eat yoghurts, salads (when can't avoid it), apples and fitness bars. Coffee, tea and fresh orange juice when it comes to pills.

Starting from tmrrw until Saturday -at least!

xoxo