I have been thinking a lot about this quote the past few days. If you take the obvious sarcasm out of it, you can actually see the truth between these words.
After deciding that London is indeed where I want to spend my following years (two? five? a lifetime?), I strive daily to be what people call 'presentable'. You have to look nice, be well dressed for any occasion during your day, to be well informed about serious news AND know the cool places to hang out. All that, if you want to make the most out of this city, to meet new people and move your -still young- life forward.
But being pretty and intelligent IS a full time job. If you don't have these skills naturally, that is. Some days I wake up and feel comfortable with myself but others, oh my, I feel the ugliest most dumb person on this planet. But no one really cares, except from your family and some friends, really. You need to put your shit together, look in the mirror and believe in yourself before this city swallows you.
Maybe some of you think I am overreacting. Seriously though, I find it hard. Moving from a capital city to an island and then to one of the biggest cities in the world seems scary to me, since I haven't figured out who I am yet- and coming to terms that maybe I never will.
It is a full time job, drains all my energy just trying sometimes.
ReplyDeleteI hope you're starting to settle in London - it's one of those places where people tend to find a pocket and stick it to. (Because of my job I rarely venture from around the City).
Do you bikram? There are a number of good studios - all as expensive as each other though unfortunately. I also find a great alternative to the gym is a long run along Embankment or Hyde Park, Regents Park - so easy to forget yourself and sink into a long stretch of calorie burning :) x
hey! thanks I have been loving London in general, yes.
DeleteI do hot yoga here in South London (not so hot as bikram) but I will definitely try that out when I find a good offer! I cannot run because of my anemia and extremely low blood pressure, so the Londoners' favourite sport is out of the question lol !!
I hope you are enjoying London! I would love to visit there one day. I agree with you. Most days I am comfortable with myself, but occasionally I do feel horrible about myself. On those days I try to make the best out of the day and I try to remain optimistic.
ReplyDeleteI feel like you though that I am not sure who I am yet and that I may never figure it out. Right now my life isn't going as I had planned and I am just not sure where it is going.