DAY 3

No question mark today. Just fruits and vegies..

I made it. Well not exactly.. I was so sick the whole day, I was literally trying to puke all day today but I just couldn't. My head was spinning, I was hungry because I didn't have the strength to boil broccoli.

Did I take my pill today? I can't remember..

Shit.

Bananas tmrrw.

Scale today? 58

Gee.. thanks..

Weekend will be an eating nightmare. I'm going to a friend's home town and her mother likes me so much. She has already made up the menu and believe me there are lots of forbidden foods in there. Panicking much? I guess so.

So my sister told me on the phone that I can't be 58 cause this past summer I was so skinny so how did I do this? Aww cute sister words! I am three kilos away from last summer, I know that don't get me started crying!!

I'll try my best girlies.

Let's all wish (and try) for a better, happy, skinny month :)

-may I wish for some extra cold weather around here, too?

And ooh la

Kinda blah.

Weekends are not for me, clearly. Because of this bank holiday, my yoga instructor cancelled the two classes we had so I spend my mornings on the elliptical machine and working out my abs and back. Well yoga helps me stay calm too, so I wasn't prepared for not having.

Who would know that these no-yoga days would be the days that

. I would have to do this -hard enough for the anemic AnnaM- diet

. my ex would appear from nowhere and I would refuse to talk to him

. I would binge in public with all my friends gossiping around

. meet this cute boy who I actually cannot admit I like. Why? Because I feel a total failure and of course he won't "notice" me

. I would realise I'm having some extra white stretch marks. Thanks a lot.

Trying to stay calm enough until tomorrow's yoga class I decided to let go of the diet for the weekend and downloaded a huge amount of yoga related songs.

Tomorrow I'm back on track, I don't know if that counts though. DAY 3. In the place of DAY5.

Who can help me get out of this misery?

I kept cleaning and cleaning my house today. I try to make it perfect. You have already seen how it looks like.I figured out that if I can't perfect my body, my relationships or my uni grades, I might at least perfect my house. So I on-line ordered a wall sticker for my bedroom. It's in form of an old street lamp, in black and I thought it would be perfect for my dark purple empty wall. When it arrives and I stick it I will post a picture!

At two and a half hours I have to be all ready cause E is picking me up. A friend of ours is playing DJ at the bar so I have to be all bubbly and nice. I know I won't. Maybe the cute boy will be there, too. Even worse.. I don't feel confident, I don't feel sexy. I just want to go to sleep.

I'm afraid though I'm missing out. I want to be able to not care and have fun instead.

Long rambling post. Oh, 57.5 this morning. That was.. kind of you, dear scale.

I know tomorrow you will be such a bitch! But okay, I know I deserve it cause I'm a bitch too.

But bitches can get crazy without yoga, you know!!

DAY 3 ?

Hmm how shall I put this? A mess..

Day 3 never happened for me. No. I went to the gym and almost fainted, so I was forced to eat -at least- chicken. Then I went out for coffee with the girls. Green tea for me thank you, I will make up for screwing it. Okay. But then we went to eat. A salad for me (stick to the vegies, AnnaM!). Okay salad only. And THEN we went for drinks. Can I go home now?

Noooo, actually you cannot. Come. Okay. Red wine for me, thank you. Okay. But three glasses and have some bread, some chips.. No no NO thank you I have to leave now. I left before they stuffed my mouth with more calories.

So yes, no DAY 3 for me.

THANK YOU MY FRIENDS.. anyway I guess I have to post my today's weight.

57.2

Loss. Great. But what about tomorrow? What about it??

Kinda drunk as you can see.... lots of thoughts, I screwed up but Sunday will be a success. I won't stop because of it. I shall continue.

I'm sorry.

DAY 2

Well I have to say I'm glad Day 1 is over.. The lack of fruit in my fridge left me starving by the end of the day and I couldn't sleep at all. I kept turning and turning around in my bed and kept going to the bathroom all night..

Anyway I guess it was all worth cause this morning my scale showed 57.5

YES! For real!

Of course I don't believe that's an actual number in one day but hell yeah it will keep me more motivated. Cause all night I had been thinking of food. Not good.

So today I had one large potato for breakfast (it was 9am !), then a huge bowl of boiled broccoli and then one bowl of long peas (?). About two cups of black coffee and numerous cups of green tea and caffeine-free cinnamon/apple tea.

My friend is coming over for a tea afternoon. I so badly hope that she doesn't bring any cookies, cause then I have to admit I'm on a diet and I don't know how strong I will remain..

I will stay strong though for day 3.

I will :)

DAY 1

Thank you SO much about all the support. Really. It helped a lot through the day.. I wasn't really ready for this diet, and today here it's a kind of a bank holiday so nothing is open, along with the grocery stores.

The only things in my fridge (and only because my mum had left them here) were some apples, 3 kiwis and a pineapple. Luckily. So today I had two apples (one red- one green), half of a kiwi and the pineapple. Wow it was hard trying to peel this thing off!

I also had three cups of black coffee, and 4 cups of green tea. I also took my pill even though I couldn't drink any orange juice with it.

So today my scale showed 59. Please do not comment on that, I'm ashamed of it by myself. I will post my weight daily and I hope it decreases by the day..

Tomorrow is vegies day, so I'm planning to go to the grocery store first thing in the morning, get the potato, lots of broccoli obviously and I can't think of something else.. I wonder if boiled corn is allowed. I guess it does, if somebody knows please comment.

It rains so fucking much right now. My windows are really old and I have some of the rain in my apartment lol. I try to ignore it though. I'm feeling little dizzy too. But other than that I am well. Didn't study cause I know the moment I will open the book I would want to eat.

Can't wait for vegetable day :)