I've been feeling lonely. Spending all of your day at home is a little too much, even for me, who as you know lack the lust for intimacy. I may be Skyping all day, but at the end of it, I sleep alone, eat alone, listen to music alone. Yeah, I know this is what I want most of the times, but this is the time when I seek for some company.
At the same time I turned down two invites for drinks tonight. From the people I like and hang out the most here. Why? Well, I don't know how to explain it, but I'll try anyway in case some of you might understand. I start to feel scared to go out again. I'm scared of the night, of Fridays and Saturdays when there's lots of people outside. I'd rather sit here and watch series by myself, than panic at the thought of going out tonight and returning home.
So, I won't even bother.
I understand sweetie. It gives me anxiety going out too. I turn them down most of the time. I'm sorry that you're struggling. Try to keep your head up.
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I understand what you mean by your anxiety about going out at the weekend but from experience the more you stay alone the more the anxiety gets worse....I hope things get better for you xx
ReplyDeleteIt's okay, I have the same thing a lot. That anxiety, that weird, gut feeling that you don't know why, but you would just rather be alone and around familiar things. It happens.
ReplyDeleteI get that. The more I need to be around people, the less I want to go out and be judged in public. I hope you brave the great outdoors, even if it's just to a park or somewhere you can sit in the sun.
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