"Or the plague"

A feverish weekend. While the sun shines and everyone invites me here and there, I am lying in bed with vitamins, cough drops, tissues and season 4 of Friends. Oh, I tried to watch Aladdin too, but it was so much noise for my head...

People are being nice, offering to bring me medicine, wash my dishes and keep me company. K came over last night and she brought me first need things, because apparently fever and constant vomiting made me unable to get out of the house.
O is being very nice to me. I don't know why. He insisted he came and keep me company, make me soup and tell me fairytales. Why can't I enjoy such invites? I politely declined, saying I may vomit on him and that would be not so nice, but he said he didn't mind. Oh my, why is he so nice to me? Two years have passed since I first turned him down and he hasn't stopped being nice to me. Anyway I am not in a decent condition, tissues everywhere, dust and vitamin glasses.
And the coughing is so sexy, it echoes though the room :)

Croissant

Friday's here. Another week just vanished into air, and no weight loss for Annamaria. Just nerves, nightmares, gym and university.I put them in order of tension. I am far better than I was on Wednesday, that means I actually got out of that bed and went to school and gym and tried to make myself feel better by doing a little window shopping. It kinda worked. Thank you for the lovely comments and suggestions on my last post :)

So at the gym there's this instructor, the best female instructor I've met here. Second best of all time, she's from Germany and really works wonders with the classes and the spinning. Me and my friend Kel had almost a year to attend one of her classes and yesterday there was a surprise for us. Mini Fucking Trampolines!! We actually did the whole aerobics class on freaking trampolines!! You know, it was frightening at first but then it was so fun! Definitely a must on a Thursday night.
At the end of the class we got to talk with her and she commented on wearing shorts or tights as sweats may stuck on the side of the trampoline. So I have a week to look a little more decent in tights.. I don't know how I got this far on the scale. But I will get it back.

I swear I will get everything back until summer.

Bells

I am having a very nerve-racking day. I seriously had one of these days when you just sit on your bed with a blanket, sobbing, trying not to burst into crying, eating while watching Friends for the millionth time. And when someone asks you what is going on, you just honestly reply: 

I don't know, everything's just too much today.

On top of all, I spilt my black coffee all over my white shirt at the university today and I had to wear it backwards. It was frustrating. 

When I finally got home I was so let down. I almost cried at the episode with the lesbian wedding, I mean that shows how not good I am today. 

Off to listen to Keane and Coldplay, oh.

Let the sunshine in

Finally a sunny Sunday that I managed to go outside. To the sea. Oh, so peaceful, how I love looking at the sea with Muse on my iPod and a latte in my hand. That wasn't the case, I met up with two friends to go eat at a local restaurant. Fried seafood and wine. We had so much wine, laughed so much and then when the sun went down, froze to death! Nice chilling day, although I had also a school report to finish.

So, warlockmistress asked what am I doing on the treadmill for one and a half hour. Look, I don't like the treadmill either, it's the elliptical I fancy better. But right now I need to burn calories without any muscle toning so I figured I spend half days on that just walking 5.8km per hour. I don't know how many miles it's that, but just Google convert them :)
So, I brought my old mp3 with me yesterday and time was spent wandering around old songs, watching "How clean is your house?" and the local news on TV and looking outside of the window as the traffic was high on a Saturday morning. The back of my feet hurt and I think I'm going to need some new trainers. Well, I have my special edition adidas since I was 15, lol. I love them though..

I am in this moment of my life, once again, where I feel so ugly. Like EVERYONE around me is beautiful and a good person and I am neither. I'm trying so hard to get out of it as long as I realise I'm falling for it. Difficult.

Bitches

So, destination: Milan.
I did it, I found a four day gap for holidays in June. It's really far away, but the thought of it was just what I needed right now.

It seems you really have to work non stop for a week to appreciate a Saturday. Now I know it. I woke up to a sunny day, drank my vitamin C and headed to the gym. One and a half hour on the treadmill, that's all I wanted for today. It's a 500 calorie intake day, so 300 calories already burnt is a win!
I made a tomato and fresh mozzarella salad and I feel really back on track. Filling my shopping cart with fresh vegetables, non fat yoghurt and special K bars, the old healthy-eating me is back.
I thought about how my friends have influenced me in a bad way, trying to prove I'm not weird and eating the fucking shit they do. Well, no more, this is my body and I will eat whatever I want and I will spend money on bio foods rather than eating fast food cause it's "cheaper". How foolish I am sometimes...and haters gonna hate (no doubt about that, as soon as I lose some weight, the pancakes invitations begin)